Why Do We Hang On to “IT” ?

November 03, 2012  |   Latest News   |     |   1 Comment

News_WhyDoWeHangOn Many people have an “it.” Something they want to change in their lives, something they know
how to change in their lives, yet just can’t seem to take the action necessary. Do you have an
“it?” Do you want to lose weight? Begin an exercise regime? Pursue a career change? Let go
of a toxic relationship?

In my experience, one of the main reasons that people don’t make changes is fear, both
conscious and unconscious. They are afraid to step into a new life, a life they want but are
too afraid won’t materialize if they really go for it. It’s more comfortable to stay where they are
and hold on to the dream that their life could be great rather than take action and face a
possible failure. In fact, some will even subconsciously sabotage themselves or put up barriers
to their own success. They will attempt to make a change but find reasons why it’s too hard to
follow through or accomplish their goal. They will hold on to the chaos of daily life as a reason
why they can’t change and live the life they really want, not only prohibiting change but putting
the blame on outside people or forces, making it unnecessary to take personal responsibility for
their own happiness.

Does this sound familiar? Is there something you want to change in your life? Are there ways
you’re sabotaging your own success?

My suggestion is that you make a list of action items needed to get where you want to go.
Take your goal one small step at a time and don’t overwhelm yourself to the point that you give
up because it’s too much. Then celebrate each success along the way.

Also, some people find creating a motivation board helps them keep focused on the goal. Put
up pictures, motivational sayings, and reasons why you want to change. Visualize your success.
And lastly, let go of it being hard. Sometimes we don’t take action because we’ve convinced
ourselves it’s too hard to do what it takes to make the change. It’s too hard to get up in the
morning and exercise before work, it’s too hard to avoid desserts and unhealthy foods, it’s too
hard to clean the house, and on and on. What if you let go of that? Stop telling yourself it’s
hard and see what happens. Does it change your outlook? Does your goal seem more
manageable once you stop trying to convince yourself that it’s unattainable?
Change is possible. You can do it. If there’s something in your life that you’ve been wanting to
change but have been struggling to bring to fruition, think about what you’re getting out of not
making the change. Awareness is the first step. Once you understand this, you can make a
plan to bring about the change you’ve been wanting. If you’d like some support, I’m happy to
partner with you in your journey to the life you’ve dreamed of.

  • 1 - Become clear on what you want to have in your life (i.e., lose 10 pounds, be in a loving relationship, pursue a career change).
  • 2 - Write down WHY you want to make this change. Make sure your “Why” is really powerful.
  • 3 - Write down what will be different about you if you make this change in your life? What will you have that you don’t have now.
  • 4 - Why is having this so important to you?
  • 5 - What are you getting out of having things the way they are?
  • 6 - Write down all the things your saboteur and self-limiting beliefs will say to you to stop you from meeting this goal (i.e., the economy is bad and no one will hire me, I will have to give up all the things I love, etc.).
  • 7 - Write down the steps you want to take in the direction you want to go.
  • 8 - Find someone who will support you in these steps in your life such as a Life Coach or best friend.
  • 9 - Keep a journal of your progress and challenges in order to gain more self-awareness and to be able to look back on all that you have accomplished.
  • 10 - Keep a growth mindset knowing that when we start something new, we are not going to be perfect or feel completely comfortable. However, the more we do it, the better we become and the easier it gets. It’s like driving a car or riding a bike for the first time, the more we do it the more it becomes hardwired in our brain.

1 Comment for this entry

    Brigitte Chandrasekhar
    June 1st, 2013 on 2:54 pm

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